事業與婚姻~~郭勇維

By 版主, October 29, 2010

「鍾意」和「愛」一個人到底有什麼分別?最大分別是,當愛上對方,妳會願意離開自己的comfort zone,凡事為著對方的好處設想,甚至會犧牲自己以成全對方,就如主耶穌為世人所作的,就是真愛的典範。故在一段男女關係當中,若彼此均以愛的態度回饋對方,就可形成一個良性循環,成就一段美滿關係。唯日前當聽到一名大學生向高官抱怨「冇樓的話,女朋友唔肯嫁比我」時,我心裡就感到很可悲,女生不願離開自己的comfort zone不特止,還要對方先為自己打造一個comfort zone,才願意進入一段緍姻關係裡面。筆者奉勸所有身處愛河中的讀者們必需要認清楚,無論是男女,到底你拍拖時的興奮感覺是建基於「鍾意」還是「愛」呢?

實情是,無論你現在的拍拖生活有多精彩,你所鍾意的異性,有時未必適合作結婚對象,反而那些外表樸素,或甚至在戀愛生活中表現笨拙的人,往往會更勝任為終生伴侶。就如上文指出,這涉及人的品格和情懆高低,與身家條件多寡無關。故若選對象時,純粹以物質作為衡量對方的首要條件,就會出現本末倒置危機。日前看到「經濟日報」報導,近年適齡未緍女性的比率持續上升,其中一些事業女性指出,工作時間長的確扼殺結識異性的機會,唯真正的「死因」其實是與雙方條件「匹配」有關:「要找一位有學識、見地,收入和家庭背景和我差不多的男仔,真的很難。如果條件不好,我寧願自己一個,和朋友去歐遊、打golf歎世界!」一 位被訪職業女性心聲。

我同意每個女性均有著她的權利去追求理想的生活方式,我只是擔心現在的理想生活方式,未必等於未來的需要,因為物欲的滿足感不可能取代兩性關係的心靈滿足,尤其是當年紀漸大,身體活力下降,身體對物欲的需求會自然減退,尤其是遇上患病,引致工作能力減退,以往事業上為自己帶來的物欲和權力等滿足感,便會煙消雲散,剩下在妳身邊的還會是甚麼呢?當這個時刻來臨時,妳就會驚覺到,擇偶的最佳時機巳經過去,一切便會後悔莫及。

我並不是叫各位姊妹即時走上街,隨便去找一個男人, 而是想說明建立一段美滿的婚姻關係,在妳的人生優先序中,所佔的地位和重要性,絶不下於妳的事業,故所需投入的犧牲和努力並非等閒,必需要付出代價和時間,若妳不抱著離開自己的comfort zone,休想獲得真愛。

寫到這裡,我忽然想起兩套拍得很棒的廣告片,這兩條廣告片由新加坡政府製作,由於新加坡與香港一樣,出現適齡女性遲婚現象,當地調查顯示主要因為很多女性認為「未找到理想的另一半」,故新加坡政府特別製作這系列的廣告片,讓大家從新正視婚姻與家庭的核心價值,廣告片出街後,引起了當地社會廣泛討論,我身邊不少單身女性朋友看完之後都感動落淚,我誠意推薦給大家欣賞。

《喪禮篇》

《孝道篇》

世上沒有完美的伴侶,但可以建立起和諧的家庭。

郭勇維
大班麵包西餅有限公司董事


6 Responses to “事業與婚姻~~郭勇維”

  1. Eric Ng says:

    What an article so specific describe the sacrifice of love & “Mordern love = Comfort zone”! Great Article!! What a beautiful life co-worked with the love of imperfect partner!!
    BTW., the hyperlink trailor are so touching!!

  2. Bighead says:

    好文章!愛是不能用錢或物質作比較的。

  3. Terence Lau says:

    因篇幅問題,只能分享一少部份?未能感到全面。至少,只感到是向著女性說,那麼男性如何?期待作者下一篇文章。

  4. Candy Ho says:

    過往的不完美, 往往是回憶中最活生生, 最有味道的.

    珍惜身邊人的獨特, 因為這是上帝的禮物.

    看後想起男友, 更珍惜上帝帶來, 獨特的他 !

  5. gigi says:

    我感謝神,能拜讀你的文章,(世上沒有完美的伴侶),神用肋骨做女人,目的也是幫助配偶,真的好獨特!

  6. My Life
    Praise the Lord Greetings I want to hear about my Ministry and me I have great love for the area and place. Which I was born in. I would like to tell you about the events good and bad of my life; there are many events that brought tears are the times that men remember the most but I think there are two different types of tears. There are happy tears and are tears of sadness.
    In my life there have been both the times of happy tears and the time of real of sadness. So I want to let you of some of these times. I was born in very remote village in Nepal where there still is no roads. My family was a Bound family. Four years after my birth my mother died and I was sent to my aunt’s house for education. After a few years I returned to my home because of my culture and situation my father arranged marriage for me when I was 13 because of this I was unhappy with this situation I left for India to get away from home. I lived in India for 4 years as a joygy . I have leprosy problem. During this time I learned a lot about this life and religion and decided that there was not truth of life and left that life.I proceeded to go to the Northern districts of India to work in Kulu Manali where my first encounter with a church happened. When I first stepped in a church I found the peace of mind which I was looking for. At that time, I also discovered about my sin. I spent much time reading the Bible interested because I had read so much of the Hindu text before. I spent much time thinking of the differences between the two.
    I finally found the verses that spoke about the redemption of the sinner through Jesus Christ and I then put my life in Him. John 3:16. After putting my faith in Jesus Christ he taught me a lot about his will and I spent much time I prayer and meditation. My whole life and my family are now Christians and we are all happy and have peace in life. Thanks Jesus Christ all in my life. PRAISE THE LORD.
    My vision
    My vision is my life, my Ministry is life
    The Lord said to me go and preach the good news to all then nations Matthew 28:18-20 How? By faith and prayer before 30 years I have start the Ministry. Our God’s hands are not too short to fulfill his plan. Training center, 6 months they are study in the class and 6 months they are outreach preach the gospel make the new church plant. Before 30 years I’m praying for one year’s church planting training center. Kindly requesting to you pray for training center. Matthew 9:35-38
    My Goal
    In Nepal 202 people groups living. Nepal has 75 districts. I want preach the gospel all the Nepal and all the 202 people groups. Nepal has many mountains and hill palace.
    1, Church planting (nomadic people groups and preach to all unreached leaving)
    2, One year’s church planting training canter. (train the people send them for gospel and new church plant) Luke 6:38
    3, Widows Women. Who lose her husband? James 1:27
    4, Orphanages children. Who lose her and his mother or father? John 14:18
    Church plant
    Now I have 9 church and many believers I want to plant more churches in Nepal like Paul.
    In Nepal widow women they lost the husband and children lost mother or father in 10 years war in Nepal. Some are lost her husband then other family cannot all-out live in same home. And water flood. I requesting to you please pray to the Lord.
    Support:
    The Lord Jesus Christ and my vision is my support. I am working Jesus Christ Ministry; I have a faith with Jesus Christ and labor making bricks and candles in order to support the Ministry as well as the widow women and orphanages children. Those are having very needs. Why? We have no any other income from any agency or any other source but any how God taking care of my church and my ministry. Psalm 27:1-5 The Lord is my light and my salvation Isaiah 41:8-20 that shall I fear?
    The Lord is the stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid? when evil men advance against me to devour my flesh, when my enemies and my foes attack me, they will stumble and fall through an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I confided. One thing I ask of the Lord one this is what I seek that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life. To gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. For in the day of trouble he will keep safe in his dwelling he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock.
    Jesus Christ provide me as a doing his Ministry end of my life. I am so much enjoying with our Jesus Christ and Ministry.
    Thank you for your interest and help. Jesus Christ blesses you Amen. Praise the Lord
    My brief history of ministry
    Thanks Jesus Christ before 30 years I will start the ministry with Raute people groups. They are living in the jungle the population of this people groups are more than 2500. they have no education, no food, no cloth and hospital. They are eating only monkey meet and grass. They have income source making wood pots and exchange with rice. They are per year one time only take bath month of January. The Lord asked me who would like to go to this people to preach the gospel. I am fasting praying then I asked yes Lord I ready for preach the good news. But much heard doing ministry with them. Whatever they eat and work I will do with them. Thanks Lord after 6 months 35 people are accepted Jesus Christ. They have church in the jungle. I make disciples handover the church them. They are worshiping the Lord in the jungle. Amen.
    Thanks Lord I move another districts Kalakos, jumla dulpa, humla, jagarkot, salan, dailak, surkhet, rukum, dang, Banke, kanchanpur and kalile. Thanks Jesus Christ I plants many church but make disciples and handover the church. I did not want hold the people and the church myself.
    Thanks Jesus Christ I will help for widow women and orphanages children in Nepal. Psalm 71:1-14-16 Tanks Lord I have 5 churches now.
    My Current Ministry
    1, Church fellowship, visit all the districts church’s and preach the Gospel.
    2, widow’s women and eye blinds man also women and Lame ministry.
    3, Orphanages children ministry.
    4, Medical camp ministry for poor people, orphanages children and widow’s women.
    From the Bible
    Thanks Lord by the Grace of God I get vision and ministry I learning from Bible many things in my life. My life count, the most important decision in life, the most important job in life, the most important question in life, read Bible to grow, spiritual growth and kingdom impact takes work and obey with Jesus Christ also with people. Thanks Lord he is great for me. Every day I pray for my all the future ministry. I will like requesting to you please pray for future ministry, training center and me with spiritual growth doing his ministry in Nepal.
    In Christ
    Pastor Paul pandey
    Jesus grace church ministry.
    Far west Nepal
    Email: bishpandey@yahoo.com
    00977-9808388063
    9823195707
    083-521538

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